Or rather, women.
But let's be more specific.
The real mystery is CONSERVATIVE women.
Why are there so damn many of them?
I mean, we want them, we approve of them, they're great, and all, but...
Let me back up a bit.
I will say, starting out, that I am personally hard to pigeonhole politically. This is because I try (granted, I don't always succeed, but I TRY,) to follow the ideas and theories I believe to be correct to their logical conclusions, and make my decisions based on whether or not I would want to live in the resulting world.
This may not be the best way to make decisions, but it's the one I've got.
Ayn Rand once said (loosely quoted,) that if you reach a contradiction, you should check your premises, because one of them is wrong.
Yeah, that.
So.
The political positions I espouse are usually not those of the masses, largely because I find overall that the moral premises from which I make my decisions invalidate AT LEAST SOME of the platform of each of the major political parties.
Like the Constitution Party... "small government, low taxes, less government interference, individual liberty, freedom, respect for and tolerance of others, God hates fags."
You had me going for a minute there, chief, but it kinda fell apart at the end.
I would say something about the Greens, but having read their platform I gather their basic idea is that we should all be living in mud huts (but getting along with everyone, which from history didn't happen even when we DID all live in mud huts,) and hoping an asteroid doesn't hit us anytime soon.
There are the Republicans: "small, limited government, low taxes, less government interference, individual liberty, freedom, we can spend all we want, God hates fags, the government has a right to tell you who you can and cannot marry."
There are the Democrats: "big, annoying government, high taxes, we can spend all we want, individual liberties as long as the government says you can have them, gay marriage is fine, we like to kill babies."
Who VOTES for ANY of these fuckers?
So we're starting to, as a nation, gradually figure out that the political parties don't actually represent anyone but the political parties themselves, and more specifically the nepotistic budding hereditary aristocracy our Congress is rapidly turning itself into, which means that as a movement, we're starting to see more and more people trying to figure out their OWN political philosophies, rather than signing on with the team that's least annoying to them.
I so want to say this is a good thing, but seeing as our education system as a whole has totally destroyed the education of millions (we rank behind the Czech Republic, people. That's just sad,) and we are a nation of ignorant, frightened sheeple, letting them wander around like the stunned, headless automata they truly are is probably a bad thing.
Just look at Massachusetts.
But all that notwithstanding, we have some die-hard faithful, on both sides.
The die-hard Republicans think the die-hard Democrats have blinders on and are burying their heads in the sand to avoid the realization of just how badly their ideas have failed when they were tried.
The die-hard Democrats seem to think that anyone who agrees with the other team is actually crazy, and they are mystified by how anyone can possibly believe such crazy things as "I want the government to leave me the fuck alone" and "my goddamn taxes are too high, you thieves."
Which brings me, like the circle of life, back to my title.
See, women are a mystery to the Left, even those of the Left who are also female, because they keep on doing batshit crazy things like joining the Tea Party or the Republican Party, and since women aren't crazy and those things are crazy, the people doing them aren't women.
Or at least that seems to be the thrust of their thinking.
The numbers of women in both the Tea Party and the Republican Party are growing steadily, as are the numbers of everyone else in the country; right now, the Democrats have alienated just about everyone, and thus the ranks of the Right are swelling across all demographics.
That said, the people who seem to be traumatizing the Left the most is the women. For some reason they are totally unable to envision a woman actually thinking that keeping babies alive is ok; they can't envision a woman thinking that success can be defined in a traditional gender role; they can't envision a woman thinking that just maybe she doesn't really want to climb the corporate ladder, working 80 hours a week, to get a corner office and a middle management job; and they can't envision a woman who DOES climb the corporate ladder, busting her ass along the way, who isn't also a rank-and-file leftist.
This mystification extends so far that they actually have been known to say that women who aren't leftists aren't really women; that conservative females are unable to think for themselves; that women cannot be both feminist and conservative because the two words together are an oxymoron; that right-wing political candidates who are female aren't there on their own merits, but merely as a sinister machination on the part of the chauvinist right-wing reactionary overlords; that women who don't vote Democrat are betraying feminism; that women who don't believe in on-demand abortions have been brainwashed; that any real woman has to vote Democrat; that any woman who doesn't vote Democrat is an Uncle Tom, or rather an Aunt Jemima...
...OK, I made that last one up, but it fits in well, wouldn't you say?
...Oh, wait, no I didn't; that's what they said about Dr. Condolleeza Rice.
See, the problem the Left has is that they really believe that they are right. Not just right but Right; theirs is the only view that matters, because theirs is the correct one, and anyone who disagrees is so obviously insane that their opinion doesn't matter.
And therefore, women who don't vote Democrat aren't women.
Which is why they are now unable to understand why so many women aren't voting Democrat.
See, in lib-land, women are unable to think for themselves.
You know it's true, because when women DO think for themselves, they get accused of everything under the sun including not actually being women.
Because part of thinking for yourself, you see, is the possibility that I might not agree with you.
Which means SOME women who think for themselves are going to disagree, no matter what your position.
Which means if you think they can't both disagree and still be female, then you believe women are unable to think for themselves.
And yet the Democrats are the party which loudly trumpets about women's rights.
Let me ask you this.
If women are in fact, as the Democrats seem to think, sort of a warm-blooded houseplant with genitals, then why are they bleating about rights for them at all? If they're non-sentient, they don't need rights.
Only sentient beings - those able to think for themselves - need rights, or can take advantage of them; which means that liberals are in a Catch-22 of their own making; either women can think, which means they need rights but might disagree, or they can't think, which means they all vote Democrat like the soulless robots they clearly are but have no need for niceties like malls because they only like what you tell them to like anyway, and you can just tell them to like living in mud huts (oops, sorry, Greens again,) wearing fresh animal skins and chewing roots with their teeth to make stew.
I guess basically what I'm getting at here is that Carly Fiorina, Sharron Angle, Sarah Palin, Michelle Bachmann, and all the other women entering politics on the Right, and those voting on the Right, are a giant stick in the eye of the clowns who've co-opted feminism, and regardless of whether or not I agree with the political stances of those women individually, I cheer wholeheartedly for what they represent...
...The idea that women can think for themselves just fine, thanks - even if the process by which they do so is occasionally a little strange to me - and are partners in life, not cargo to be carried along to some imagined goal line.
You Dems ought to be ashamed.
