A Bunch Of Random Crap

First:

And second:

Xeno's Mighty List of Favorite Movie Moments. Not favorite MOVIES, just moments.

• A tie, from "The Thing" : "You gotta be fucking kidding" and "I don't know, but it's weird and pissed off, whatever it is"
• "Monobrow!" from Epic Movie
• "It was in my way." from Alien 4
• "Mine?Mine?Mine?Mine?" from Finding Nemo. (I don't care about the rest of the movie, but that scene is friggin funny.)
• the Meow game, from Super Troopers
• "Don't pretend you're not impressed!" from Anchorman
• the closing swordfight in House of Flying Daggers
• "The next time you feel put upon..." from The Ref
• The moment of silence, from Children of Men
• the getaway from the casino, in Next
• "you weren't supposed to HELP her," from The Ring
• the milk scene, from The Grudge 2
• the last 30 seconds of The Eye 2
• "Is that you, John Wayne? Is this me?" from Full Metal Jacket
• "No harm will come to you, just give me back my surfboard" from Apocalypse Now
• "She's a goddamn human being, man!" from Platoon
• "Now THAT's how to complain," from Saving Private Ryan
• the death of the Forest Spirit in Mononoke-Hime
• "All restaurants are Taco Bell now" from Demolition Man
• the printer-killing scene in Office Space
• "omg she's right behind me" in Inner Senses
• "'Do you want to run this ship?' 'Yes.'" from Serenity
• "your lower intestine" from Parenthood
• "are you blind? It's a cock!" from Death To Smoochy - which I will note that every one should see.
• A tie: the infamous radish scene, or the opening 2 minutes, of Suicide Circle
• the husband's face mask in The Devil's Rejects
• Napoleon Dynamite's mad dance skills
• "we're gonna need a bigger boat" from Jaws
• "This one can TUNE" from Dark City
• the old lady on the ceiling from Exorcist 3
• Jet Li's fight with himself in The One
• "I'm going to kill them all" from Soldier
• "You teamkilling fucktard" from Red Vs. Blue Season 1
• Val Kilmer performs "Skeet Surfing" in Top Secret!

That, of course, isn't ALL my favorite scenes; just some of them.

And finally, just because it deserves a rehash, and I couldn't find this track for the playlist:

A Note About "Epic Movie"

Which same we are still in the middle of watching.

If you haven't seen it, you haven't missed much; in all honesty my wife just made a comment that was funnier than any joke thus far in the movie.

But if you have seen it...

When Peter is getting all up on the blue chick, and she's showing off her shapechanging skills for him, Tara says:

"Haha, the king is a chubby chaser."

ROFL.

When I stop laughing, I will say something sarcastic.

More Quick Notes, HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY 1 of 2

First, I would like to say that despite all the hoopla about Wal-Mart being an evil corporation, I've never seen any evidence of it. They run their business in a perfectly respectable way, and if people not working for them aren't happy with the way they get out-competed, well, sucks for them.

That said, Wal-Mart has finally done something that actually IS reprehensible, and thankfully, they're getting in very - potentially cataclysmic - serious trouble over it.

See, secretly, Wal-Mart had apparently been buying up life insurance policies on their employees - as many as 350,000 of them - and collecting the cash when their employees keel over. They stopped buying the policies in 1995, but they kept right on collecting the payouts without telling anyone, because they count as non-taxable appreciative interest income, which means that the longer you live, the more money Wal-Mart makes off you when you die.

Now, see, that really IS fucked up. Good thing they're getting sued for it, hmmm?

Because Kitty Genovese is completely forgotten, history repeats itself; LaShaunda Calloway died in a mall on June 23rd, after being stabbed, because five other mall customers STEPPED OVER HER TO BUY SNACKS, and one even stopped to take a picture of her with a cell phone camera; not one offered assistance. Police have not yet released the security camera video, but I assure you that if they do I will be reposting it.

This article... well, just read the headline. Awesomeness.

Dr. Ron Paul considers himself to be a contender, apparently, and he may be more on the money than the party bigwigs are willing to admit. After he discovered that he had not been, and was not going to be, invited to a debate forum with 6 other Republican candidates, he simply held his own rally next door to the forum, and drew a bigger crowd. That's the way, doc; show 'em how it's done. I still won't vote for you, because you haven't got a chance in hell this time around, but that's a damn fine showing, right there.

And last but not least, vindication is a fine thing. The Goldman family has won their court case, and they are now working on a publishing deal to bring O.J. Simpson's book on how he killed his wife, and Ron Goldman, to press under the title "Confessions Of A Double Murderer," which is unquestionably more accurate.

Just thought I'd share.

Conquering One's Disability...

In a damn impressive fashion, thanks.

Handicapped Dance Contest

Damn.

Several Quick Notes...

Ok. First, I want to say that I grew up watching The Transformers. But I have been highly skeptical about the live-action movie, largely because Michael Bay is not known for his
directorial skill; he has, to date, made one movie I liked.

Now, the trailers make the movie seem much more impressive, and that's good, but let me tell you - sending the film reels to theaters in locked cans with combinations to be sent on opening day, to prevent advance "buzz," means it sucks. It SUCKS. I mean, if you don't want word to get out about it at all, that means your movie BLOWS ASS, and you KNOW IT DOES, and are hoping to make enough on opening weekend to make up for the fact that after opening day, no-one will see it again, ever.

Second, New York's Finest proved themselves again recently by arresting a man for reading the First Amendment - you know, the one that says "you can say wtfever you want," - through a bullhorn at a rally. Go, FREEDOM!!

Third, if you're ever in line waiting to buy the new, hot electronica, pray, PRAY I tell you, for this woman to show up. She's rich, and stupid, and that means you can make money.

Now, I know any Superman fans out there have to be wondering why the most popular and well-known Superman storyline of all time has yet to get the movie treatment; fear not, DC heard you. But rather than spend some number of million dollars to try to make a live action movie and inevitably fuck it up, DC had the brilliant idea of making Superman: Doomsday - the film version of the "Death of Superman" story - into an animated movie, instead, so that they could horribly fuck it up in a new and different way.

At any rate, it'll be direct-to-DVD, which means it will come packaged with bonus extra suck, and devalue the intellectual property and the franchise itself even further. Oh, and they pulled the entire Justice League out of the movie, and left Superman all by himself from the get-go, for the simple reason that they wanted Superman to be the only hero in the movie, despite there being like dozens of characters in the graphic novel.

Go, DC Comics!