I am not, by any stretch of the imagination, a parenting expert, despite the fact that I have a child.
This is because there is no such thing. There are a ton of people who claim the title, sure, but nobody who deserves it.
See, even if you have twelve children and they all turn out well-adjusted and happy, you're only an expert in raising YOUR kids; not mine. Children are individuals, and very, very different from one another, even within the same family.
So, where do you learn your parenting skills?
Two places: trial and error, and from your own parents.
On to politics!
One of the things El Presidente announced during his "so full of it that he squeaks going into corners" "state of the union" speech the other night was a tax credit for "families with at least one parent working."
That's not really what it means, in fact, if you read what exactly he proposed.
See, what he wants to do is extend a tremendous handout to married couples where both parents work, and single parents who work, doubling the existing tax credit for child care expenses.
Because day care is expensive!
But see, the group that doesn't get any?
The folks who believe in having one parent stay home with the children.
See, when a child is in daycare every day, rather than being at home, they are deprived of several things of varying degrees of importance. They are deprived of the direct love and attention that a parent gives their own personal child; no teacher can love your kids like you can. They are deprived of their parents' life experience and guidance; teachers are there to educate a child in facts, not to show them how to love life, how to love other people, and certainly not how to think for themselves. They are deprived of their opportunity to watch their parents make decisions, watch their parents work together, watch their parents...
...Be parents.
A teacher, no matter how gifted or inspired, is not a parent. Or at least not YOUR parent.
It is not an accident, you see, that children are getting more and more whacked out as we deprive them of those things.
When daycare was first attempted, parents thought it was a tremendous relief; having only a single income is an enormous financial burden, and something difficult to maintain.
So they stuck their kids in daycare, and there was a revolution of women entering the workforce.
Great advancement for women, right?
Except those kids - that whole generation - grew up without their parents. And they learned that that kind of absenteeism is ok.
And they grew up - and stuck their kids in daycare, too.
And now we have kids who are third or fourth generation daycare babies, and they're a wreck.
Look, I will be the first to say that the folks who work in daycares might be the best, most well-intentioned and adjusted people out there; but nothing they do can make them the parent of my child, or yours.
It's not the fault of daycare workers that daycare is inherently harmful to children.
But daycare IS inherently harmful to children.
It can be compensated for; parents who have no financial alternative can take extra time when they're NOT at work to nurture, watch out for, guide, and cherish their kids, and that can by and large make up for being away from them 8+ hours a day.
The thing is, you see, most parents who plunk their kids in daycare don't do those things.
And if you're not ready to BE A PARENT - which means taking responsibility for your child's well-being, personal responsibility and financial responsibility - then you by God shouldn't be one.
I mentioned, on Facebook, that I thought El Presidente's idea was bogus as hell, and one of my friends immediately - you can guess which team she's on - jumped on me about it, and demanded to know "who can afford to have a stay-at-home parent these days?"
Well, actually, until a few months ago, _I_ could. And those of you who know me know that I didn't work anyplace fancy.
It's just that we gave our son good food - at the price of not eating so well ourselves.
We gave him new clothes to wear - at the price of letting our own wardrobes become a little threadbare.
We have taught him, nurtured him, guided him - at the price of having a lot less "free" time.
Because when you're a parent, your child not only should, but MUST, come first. Always. They are more important than your flashy clothes, your nice car, your gourmet food, your yoga classes, your computer games, your blog, your friends; they are, and must be, the most important thing in your life.
And if you're not willing to commit to that, to commit to that level of support and attention, then you are not ready to be a parent, period. Full stop. End of line.
You can be poor, and be a good parent.
But you can't be a bad parent and be rich in any way that means anything.
El Presidente's plan will make daycare far more appealing to a far broader spectrum of parents. It is always easier to pass the buck than to accept responsibility, and when you not only allow it, but pay people to evade their responsibilities, they will do so.
I wonder what the government stands to gain from having a whole generation of children raised by...
...The government?
