Goddammit, Nintendo, Why?!

So, before I really get going with this, you should know that the "NES Classic" is limited to only 30 specific, built-in games.

The new Switch system, with its tiny on board storage and absurd over-reliance on peripherals, has numerous developers that have promised games and support, but very few titles are confirmed, and the official production numbers look like Nintendo is poised to have yet another launch where they can't even come close to meeting demand,  thus crippling their own sales and Market penetration, again.

Again.

Why, Nintendo?

You're just going to end up with another console generation where your only contribution is another round of Mario and Zelda games, and we get it, guys, but Mario just isn't compelling enough to drive an entire console alone.

So, thankfully, I'm here to save the day.

I'm going to give you an idea that will make you literal billions of dollars,  and I'm not even going to charge you a consultancy fee, because I know you will never,  ever actually do it.

Ready, guys?

Think handheld.

Start with the same emulator and engine for the NES Classic. Add a more significant storage; for example, a 120gb  solid state drive. Add an LED screen capable of handling 16 bit graphics. No touch screen, no crazy extra stuff.  Build enough buttons and controls to act as a Super Nintendo controller (d-pad, four face buttons, two shoulder buttons,) right onto the device.

NES and Super NES games are fricking tiny. 120gb gives you enough space for literally every Nintendo-owned title from both consoles, and enough space left for every third party game you can figure out licensing for.

Literally hundreds of games.

No need for Internet connectivity, no need for peripherals, just usb fast charge and a 6 hour battery.

Low battery use due to the low processing, memory, and screen power means a 6 hour battery would be smaller and cheaper than the one in my phone.

If you want to get really crazy, put in a micro SD slot so people can swap saves.

I'm talking about a retro handheld, able to play hundreds of games, with absolutely no need for internet, no need for peripherals, and did I mention hundreds of games?

Not thirty, hundreds.

MSRP $99.99, you'd sell so many of those it's not even funny.

Which is step 2.

Advertise the shit out of it.

Open a long preorder. Like 9 months long. Get your production lines going, estimate that brick-and-mortar demand will be twice the preorders.

Watch the preorder numbers.

Build enough to meet a total of three times the preorders on launch day.

Sit back and make money, because this should be pretty much pure cheddar for you after the design is finalized.

Guesstimate that interest + price will sell about 15 million of these things. If you guys cheap out on materials and workmanship and still can only scratch out $15 in profit per sale, that would be $225 million.

Add a case with some Mario and Zelda logos that costs you 6 bucks and you sell for $25, that's another $300 million.

You're now at half a billion dollars.

Offer some games as for-pay downloads using the usb; another $200 million.

Track achievements, and let gamers upload their stats to a (free!) account to show their friends.

Authorize YouTube videos of games / achievements. (And knock off copyright takedowns. Do you seriously not understand free advertising? Just require that Nintendo ads play with any video that shows Nintendo games or characters.)

Hell, use the SD slot to save videos with a "shareshot" button.

Charge $20 for each of four or five collectible, differently colored and logoed SD cards.

You're already well over a billion dollars.

Thank me with a free one.